Its been a month that I published an article. Pressures of being an "adult" student and work have been so taxing on me. I feel relieved now and look forward to other things. The Lord has been wonderful to me. The end of my study coincides with the 17th anniversally of my late mother who was called into the glory of the Lord on 17th July 1991. I was away to a boarding schooling and never saw the last moments of her life and what she could have said to me.
Its a painful experience to loose a parent, a mother for that matter. It is even worse when it happens when you only clock 15, young, immature and in dire need of parental care. The last day that I saw my ill mother was on 14 May 1991, in the company of my friend Martin..It was Kamuzu day..I have one photo with Martin..we were the small boys of our class then...interms of looks. It was the day that I cried for my mother while she was still alive. I thought she was loosing her battle with life. She consoled me as a brave woman with authority over her son. It was an emotional moment but she assured me she will be fine. My own father, who was taking care of her put on the face of a brave man and both them told me not to worry and concetrate on my studies. Both were teachers..and teachers want the best of their children.
It was taxing moment for me. Very emotional one. I went into prayer for my mother on a number of occassions with prayer mates, Haxwell and other friends in our SCOM group. It was such a beautiful Wednsday, July, 17, 1991..that i was so much into my books and had been preparing for my form 1 History exam. Evenets began to unfold. After class..I was asked to see the headmaster and they put me in Government White Landrover to see my late uncle Chipundwe in Rumphi town...we never found him...end of story i thought until in the middle of the night when the unexpectec happened. All my roommates were awakened except me..my bags packed while I was asleep. It looked like I was a mad person on pills and my tenders not sure how to handle me. When I woke up..the face of my uncle and my mums boss in the middle of night was evidence that my dear Jerine was no more...I have a few recollection...I know what has happened...Life was not be the same. Getting into that MG 347K lorry in the middle of the night, next to the coffin of my mother, in the cold of the night, as we meandered through the dusty roads of Kazuni, Mpherembe, Kafukule up to Hannock Ngwira Village has never escaped my memory. Jerine was no more. It was real. No jokes. The sight of my siblings, much younger that me at 15, added more pain. The thought of an elder brother who had to kept out of the know to finish a Junior exam..put much burden on me. I couldnot handle the situation. So we laid her to rest in the afternnoon of July 18, 1991 at our Hannock Ngwira home. Death is painful.
As I recall the events surrounding my mothers passing away, today I celebrate what a great person she had been. From a humble upbringing, being raised by brothers, after my maternal grandparents early death, my mother had been a symbol of resielence. The spirit that i borrowed and I live with it. It is now to celebrate her beautiful life and the never gave up spirit that I feel i got from her in the fifteen years that she had for me. The only thing, that sometimes exerts pain, is that she has not been able to see the fruits of her labour. Dear mother, I will live your dream...and become a son a mother can be proud of.
If you have a mother,celebrate with her. I miss such a thing. I wish she was still here to celebrate my successes. What the Lord gives, he takes away as well. Lets cherish every second of life with family, friends and loved one.
Rest in Peace Jerine Lonely Kundabene!
2 comments:
oh oh what a lovely passage. Just like you I lost my mother at 15 in 1995 when I was in form one. I have passed through many unpleasant situations that I know would not have been there if she was there.
I have mostly liked the following passage " If you have a mother,celebrate with her. I miss such a thing. I wish she was still here to celebrate my successes. What the Lord gives, he takes away as well. Lets cherish every second of life with family, friends and loved one. This is so powerful and I usually tell friends who have mothers the same.
Wishing you a Prosperous New Year.
I am sorry for your loss. What a moving story you have told, so vivid, i could almost hear your heart beating as you saw your uncle standing in front of you in your room, while you anticipated to hear the worst, yet deep down still hoped that the news was not that of your mother.
I was especially touched by the part when you were put in the same lorry as your mother's coffin, I could imagine you were trembling from the cold air hitting against your young body, and also from the shock of losing you Mother.
Do not feel dispair because you were not there when your mother passed on, I lost a sister in 2005. When she was sick, she had requested for me to visit her since we lived in different countries, because she felt the end was neer, i remember that call so clearly, I was parked by Spar, in the same car as my mother and her driver. as i heard those words, i tried to fight off the stinging pain i could feel in my heart, i did not want to cry in front of my mother because all her hopes would be killed if she knew her daughter was prophesying her approaching death. I promised I would go, but did not, i was bound for England for my studies. I promised her, I would go the next year to see her. four days after I arrived in England, I got a call, on my sister's birthday. It was my mother, in a brave voice she said the words I had been dreading. It has been hard to overcome that pain. sometimes the best way to overcome it is the way you have so well put it, to honour that person, their life, and try to do that which would have pleased them.
From now on I will cherish my mother more in remembrance and celebration of your mother's life. everytime we have a misunderstanding, i will remember you and the sorrow you feel for the passing of your mother.
again, I am deeply sorry for the loss of your precious mother and thank you for sharing this personal experience with the rest of the world
Anne Frank
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